If It Is You

This is the twentieth in a series of journal entries begun in October, 2009. See initial blog post on February 21, 2010.

“Lord, if it is you…command me to come.”

Who but Jesus could have come, walking on the water? Yet Peter needed the reassurance, “Lord, IF it is you, command me”.

You didn’t chide. You didn’t ignore. You didn’t walk away. You simply met Peter at the place of his faith and you said, “Come”.

I am as Peter, Lord. Four weeks ago the storm began to rage, fear filled my heart. Three weeks ago you came, as I peered out into the darkness of the unknown, anxious only to be safely on the shore. “Calm the storm”, was my prayer. Rescue me, as you have done so many times before. But not this time, not yet. As I cried out to you… seeking your comfort…. seeking only to be with you, you led me to know you were out on the water. Would I recognize you in the storm?

“Wait!” This was you’re a command. “Give me room to work,” was your admonition.

“Obey.”

For Peter to obey was to step out….for me, to obey, is to step back. For both of us, the storm still rages….all that holds us is having our eyes fixed on you. Oh Lord, when I am tempted to look around, when I am tempted to ask you to silence the wind and waves…when I am tempted to ask again if it is really you, let me hear your voice, let me fix my gaze upon you.

Draw me Lord, may my desire for you be greater than my fear of all that surrounds me.