Monday, April 12, 2010

If The Lord Had Not Been My Help

This is the fourteenth in a series of journal entries begun in October, 2009. Please see initial post on February 21, 2010.

November 2, 2009

I confess, I needed to hear a word of encouragement from you…so I jumped ahead to read your word for me from tomorrow’s Psalm, the 94th. Once again, you did not fail me.

“If the Lord had not been my help my soul would soon have lived in the land of silence.” You, O Lord, are the only one who truly understands. You know the word you have given, instructing me to wait. You alone know the fear that waiting can bring.

I cannot continue to talk about it, even to those who are closest. Indeed, if you were not my help, I must needs dwell in silence. But you are there, you are listening, you are my help. I would feel my stride slip, my foot falter, but for you O Lord.

“When the cares of my heart are many, your consolations cheer my soul.”

You see the cares of my heart tonight, indeed they are many. Care for what I cannot know at this time. Console me O Lord, be my stronghold and my God, the rock of my refuge. Hide me Lord-in the cleft of the rock-in the palm of your hand. Cover my ears and my eyes that I might hear and see you only. May I know your touch and desire your fragrance.

O Lord, in you I trust, may I not be ashamed.

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